Thursday 9 March 2017

To the guy who can't understand the girl who refuses to be happy

Everyone wants to be happy and shine with a bright smile. But sometimes it so happens that you just cannot. It's not that you don't want to be happy or you don't want to fight for it, it's just that you are so tired and worn down by the storms that you have endured for so long, that you just don't have any strength left to fight. But it doesn't mean that you don't want to be happy.

Life can be harsh at times. And for those who refuse to give in, those who refuse to give up on people and those who continue to give without any expectations, things can be a little draining at times.

No one wants to give up. But when living becomes more difficult than dying, when memories start inflicting physical pain, when situations refuse to change, when you lose all hope, when you have no strength to fight back, what do you do? You give up.

They say that sharing your problems can help in easing up the pain and perhaps in some cases help in solving the problem. But does it always help?

Not every situation or problem can be treated in the same way. Like a lock, every problem has a specific solution and can be unlocked by a specific key. But what if you lose the key or better yet, what if the maker of the lock forgot to make a key and you get locked in a closed room with no windows to let in a single ray of hope? Is there a way out? May be. Can you stay optimistic for ever? No.

If you are dealing with a girl (or a guy) who seems to have given up on happiness without any reason, your frustation is understandable. But it's not fair to simply designate the person as 'arrogant' or 'stubborn' as you do not know the underlying stories. You don't know every single incident that was so powerful that she gave up on life, that broke her to the level when she couldn't stand up and face herself in the mirror. You don't know the countless scars that years of fighting have left on her soul. You don't know the endless tears that she has shed. You don't know the emptiness that is eating her alive like a blackhole. 

Unless you know her story, you cannot understand her. Unless you don't understand her, you can't judge her.

If you really want to help her, make her feel that she can trust you. Prove that you aren't like every other person who has walked into her life without any intention of staying. Prove that you take pride in her scars. Prove yourself to be worthy of her trust. When you prove that she can trust you, she'll open up to you and share her story, every single word of it. And trust me she's worth it, because a person who has been hurt over a million times and yet has the strength to love, knows how to love selflessly and completely. And that person can never hurt another soul, ever.